Well...this weekend Michael got a little upset with me. I don't know if he got the taste of Florida in his mouth again (i am sure you can recall...the lady that was trying to do laps...and Mike not being as amused as we were). Well anyway...here is what went down.
On Friday, Mike and I were about to begin our romantic dinner at the T.B. to stall before Randy's game. I took a seat (table by the window-with a view) while Mike waited for our food. Seated on my right was a dad with his three, young children. Seated a couple tables away were two highschool students who were there with their mom. She was near Mike waiting for their food. As I sat there, people watching, my attention was drawn to these two highschool students. One of them was telling the other about his day. He was speaking very loudly and his conversation included the words "mother f***er" six times and talking about how someone was holding a knife up to him and he said to go ahead and stab him. After the 6th mf bomb, the teacher in me was crawling out. I slowly walked over to their table, leaned in, and whispered these words, "Excuse me, sorry to bother you, but could you possibly watch what you say because there are young children around and i can hear you from all the way over there..." then I excused myself and walked casually back over to my table. Two seconds later....the young man who needed his mouth washed out with soap walked out of the Taco Bell. Mike comes back with the food and immediately says, "What did you just do!". I explain quietly to Mike and kept an eye on this family. The mom came back to their table, went outside and got her son, and they all sat down. She continued to ask them what was wrong and the one boy said, "People who don't know me comin over here tellin me my business!". They point me out as the girl with the sweater, and the mom says.....get this...."Well she looks ignorant". Unbelievable. Did her son fail to mention what he was talking about?? I was waiting for her to come over to my table and say something so I could point out who the ignorant one was.
Both families left and Mike continued to point out why I need to watch what I say and be careful and blah blah blah....when three teenagers sit down at a table near by. In mid conversation, I can see the guy leaning all the way back in his chair trying to hear our conversation. I look right at him and say, "Would you like me to talk louder so you can hear us better?" . He almost fell backwards. Mike says, "We are leaving right now".
I think sometimes Mike forgets that I am not afraid to say what is on my mind...or point out when I see something that's wrong. I think he forgets that I grew up in Calumet City and am not afraid of people. I think he forgets I work with kids...and have for almost 5 years. I think he forgets that I am a Fagan.....which is code for "one bad a** motherf***er". (I just wanted to put it in words that those kids would understand). I have my mom, my sisters, and even sometimes my dad and brothers, to thank for making me such a strong woman...and maybe Mike forgets that. Or maybe he just wants to protect me. Or maybe he just wants me to shutup. Whatever it is, at the end of the day, I feel good because I didn't just sit back and let it happen. I stood up for what is right. And isn't that what I am always trying to teach my kids anyway?
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4 comments:
The most common thing to do is to turn away and not intervene in a situation that appears wrong. Studies are done all the time on people and their reactions when presented with situations like the one you experienced. More likely than not, people will, excuse this saying "turn a deaf ear" and do nothing.
You are beyond your years in your attitudes and your initial reaction to things such as this. You are right, you are a product of your environment and you have been a "teacher" since you were very young. That is not a job you turn off and on at will...it is your vocation and it defines who you are. Rarely have I seen you afraid to speak up when you know something is wrong, whether it is in protection of your home and neighborhood, or standing up to a difficult jr. high classmate you go with your instinct and act first.
I am proud of you and I know from conversations with some of the others that they too have intervened and acted to help out in a situation. It could be something so simple as helping someone find their car or standing up for someone who has been treated badly.
In this case you were doing what you do best, you teach, by definition you communicate, educate, and instruct, it's just a shame that there are so many uneducated people out there, you have your work cut out for you!
Mike does the same thing but in a more understated way. So, my advice for him is to sit back, buckle up, you're in for a bumpy ride!!!
You go Bonnie! I probably would have done the same thing. And Ryan would have said the same thing Mike did. When will they ever learn?
I love that you stand up for what you believe in - but always be careful of who you choose to voice your opinions to - not always so many nice people out there.
I have read Allisons and yours today, a byproduct of insomnia.....when I read the comment about doing laps I almost choked, remembering how funny we are (to ourselves), how others looking in may not think so (which, unfortunately, makes it funnier),and Kyle with his feet hooked on the edge of the pool doing sit ups and speaking a mantra "PLEASE, I'M DOING LAPS!!!"
Ah well, not everyone is funny like us..
I'm with Stacy....I am so proud of you, and your ability to handle situations with people...it's the people I don't trust..don't ever change (kinda like saying hope the sun comes up), but be aware. Anyone touches you and I go Rambo..Oh, Mike, give it up man, you WILL lose..remember, what you love about her, may drive you crazy once in a while..but you could do no better than her. I love and miss you Bonnie....ur.
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